Me and God - Video

Another chapter has been spoken in our telling of faith stories. Our youngest member - the maker of many of our greatest cuppas - has recorded a new video about her faith. As the words of a young woman with learning disability it speaks for itself. We are all further challenged in our discipleship and faith sharing by the openness and honesty with which she speaks.

This was recorded for her to use at her confirmation service so talks about the church, her faith, and her sense of calling....

Her struggle to get smooth sentences out means its a bit disjointed visually - the film editing has been done by an extreme amateur - me!

As a group we've been distracted by a couple of other events in the last few weeks but are looking to developing out telling about Jesus along with our blanket and some jam making during June.

Lonely hero or band of sisters - Decisions and Faith

Sometimes I wonder if I should have begun pioneered alone, rather than attempting to pioneer with the women as a group. I could have unveilled a new Church environment quickly and this may have been very successful. However, something made me choose otherwise. I saw Jesus in the eyes of these women and saw them as part of the future. I had respect for their commitment and believed God was calling them to something new.

The path I have taken means that I have had an eye to modelling change and mentoring a couple of the women in mission and leadership. It takes longer to travel as a group, but I continue to believe the group,  are significant to the mission of God in this neighbourhood. I have a complete sense of personal inadequacy to the task, but that is the point. It is God who is (more than) adequate to the task.  Together we are discovering that power of God released in us by our faith, which grows as we work together. His power is always sufficient for the task!

Newcomers and faith

Possibly some of the women are talking more about their faith in their daily lives. I say this because over the last couple of months they have brought 3 different people to worship on Sundays, one of whom is attending regularly.

By a fascinating set of circumstances, one of these is a woman we prayed for regularly during 2009-10 when she was seriously ill, and the other 2 are neighbours of a family who are also beginning to attend Sunday worship.

It seems ironic that work aimed at developing Church beyond the walls of Sunday and the institutional structures may be resulting in fresh interest in approaching God through traditional worship.

Although the women have invited at least 2 people to join them on Thursdays this has not yet been productive. I guess this is a good thing as the women are going to be at the ecumenical Lent course for the next month so our more normal meetings are suspended. I am also minded that the period of transformation we seem to be in on Thursdays may be at a stage which requires stable membership. My decision to attempt to work with this group and support transformation probably requires the women to feel secure in a new identity before they will successfully offer hospitality to new members.

© Dave Walker

Blanket Knitting

The yarn has arrived and everyone has chosen their thread (with a few extra for any newcomers). One of the women took responsibility for casting on, and the knitting has begun.

Everyone was very excited and already we have all taken a turn. I think it is the most riotous gathering we've had yet. Apart from the initial excitement we have been playing 'musical chairs.... its much easier to knit the blanket if you are sitting alone on the sofa so we took it in turns to occupy the best seat in the room.

We now have about 8 rows completed, but it will be a while before we do any more. Church leaders have organised the ecumenical Lent Study to fit with our meeting times and the women have decided to join with them for the next 5 weeks. I feel a little sad but am interested to see what happens.

Testimony Effect

The testimony was great!

I'm not speaking particularly about the impact of the story... I'm talking mostly about the impact of the telling on all the members of the group. The woman who told her faith story is so full of the experience, and the sense she had of God's presence - which all the other members of the group who were present could see. She told her story again today to the woman who missed the service, and everyone was able to re-live the event.

She was asked lots of extra questions, both about her story, and about what it was like to stand up in front of people. She talked of how it felt (she had found it a very good experience) and was telling everyone else to have a go. Even the most timid member of the group was starting to think about it by the end of the conversation. One recounted a part of her own story which linked in to the conversation.

I thought back to 2 1/2 years ago when I lead a series of interactive services on the 'Time to Talk of God' report. At that time not one of them was able to tell anything of their story to each other... the most personal thing they said was about enjoying going to Easter People some years previously.

I wonder if their will be opportunities for the women to develop this during the Lent course, as we will not be meeting until after Easter.

Telling Faith Stories

Out of the talk of testimonies God is growing something.

Some half formed reflections, leading to some half formed thoughts, led to a conversation.... the outcome is a member of the group will tell parts of her faith story at a pancake party cafe worship.

The woman has never told much of her story to anyone, and she asked to meet and talk about it.

We sat over several cuppas and, with encouragement, this amazing story of meeting with God and being changed emerged. The Holy Spirit was palpable as she told of a mystical meeting with Jesus, but the most powerful part of the story was her realisation, for the first time, that over the following 50 years she has been shaped by the Spirit within her. We held each other as the awesome power of God's transforming grace was revealled to us.

I left the question: 'How has our conversation today changed things?' but I sense I already see some of the answer. She went off to 'normal' life aglow with God's light shining out from within her.

I believe both of us have been changed by the encounter, and I suspect that this sub-plot will have a significant impact on the longer term story of our group.

Journeying by Grace

Logo of Grace, Ealing

By God's grace we seem to be moving on with our journey. Perhaps one day I will cease to be surprised when this happens. I haven't really seen the process happen, but we are now engaged in a corporate act of blessing - we have started the process of making a blanket. The conversation wasn't: 'shall we make a blanket for someone?' it was: 'who shall we make a blanket for?' Much is veiled.

This acts as a reminder to me - Jesus asks us to follow him, not to understand everything, or to make life happen.We live by grace, and our actions are both the result of grace, and the means of grace. This group of women within which each of us are both being held, and holding others is, and is becoming, a place of grace.

It looks like the language of 'blessing' may be the way of describing this within the group's culture - and I am hopeful it will be valid language in the wider community of which the group is part. No doubt this will become clearer as time passes.

Blessing 2

We have just met at my home, rather than the church's prayer room. When the women heard I had finished the carpet rug they wanted to come and see it. They also co-incidentally saw the matching blanket.

The blanket generated a flood of inspiration and they want us to make one together and give it as a blessing to a younger woman we all know.

Together the colour scheme has been planned, and we are to have one thread of yarn each. I have to buy some new wool!

Knitting (and Dorcas)

Back from my holiday I said I had some ideas to share with the women, and they were up-for-it.

I took along a decorated sheet with some prayers on it, the extreme knitting scarf that a couple of the women had previously had a go at, and the story of Dorcas. My thoughts were that the prayers would offer normality, they would engage in the knitting, and the bible story would be challenging (not so much for its content, but because I would be asking them to share their thoughts on it).

It was one of those days when Community Transport messes things up so beginning was higgledy-piggledy although the opening prayer brought us together well and enabled focus.

As I expected the knitting was a hit... but I was still surprised that everyone completed some. It is only some scraps of wool, and the enthusiasm meant it ran out.

I introduced the story while we knitted. This is an important part of my ideas - that we share the bible, and any other stories, in the midst of our activity. I wanted the women to share, but they found it hard. I had made the mistake of focusing on the concepts rather than the people in the story. I could see the links so easily I forgot to give the women the space to make them.

I'm not sure if we reached any shared understanding through the story, I suspect we made it through the knitting as we produced a shared creative work. It is not something of any real use but as we untangled the wool we spoke of the strands coming together, and as we looked at the knitting we tried to identify each persons contribution.

Somehow we did get to the seed of a conversation about blessing, but only as the structure took over with a panic about what time the bus was returning to collect people!

Blessing

It was one of those moments when the Celtic approach of God being involved in everything wins out. I was sitting doing some extreme knitting - the knitting that precipitated our first gathering when the women wanted to see the giant needles and finger thickness wool - and wondering what to do when I finish my present rug. 

No - we're not planning to knit a bus - but I like the idea of thinking big!

It came to me to knit a rug for a local couple’s new conservatory, the knitting of it would be hallowed - a blessing to them. 

This is what we might be about - being a blessing to others in response to God’s abundant blessing of us. Perhaps we might even begin the process of viewing ourselves in this way by sharing in the knitting of the rug.

Already our jam and marmalade making has been a blessing for us and for others. Some of the women knit for charity. The group already has a longstanding commitment to support Briar House (the local residential home). And, only last week, they gave money towards the youngsters going away. 

I believe that BLESSING is the answer to what has long been bugging me..... I have known that the group is called to engage in mission to their own community, generation, and culture, but not HOW we were being called to do it.

Blessing is a way of being and doing mission that is natural to the women, and also flexible enough to give space for different degrees of health, mobility and confidence. It gives us a fresh understanding of our reason for being together - to welcome God’s blessing together and share God’s blessing with others. Through this our being and our action become worship to God.

I will use Dorcas as an example of a woman who modelled this blessing of others, and we can talk about women we have known. I suspect that the women will encourage and build each other up by sharing how each of them has blessed the other - just as the widows showed the garments Dorcas had made to Peter. 

Now I shall pray for a space to bring this word from God to the women.

Steadfast

This morning I was deep in despair and hopelessness. All around me I sensed barriers and traps preventing any progress and almost denying hope. It seemed that most ways forward were blocked, and fear was preventing me moving in any directions that remained.

This state of affairs has been going on for some time - probably months, and after todays event I am wondering if it has been unnecessarily sustained by a sense of isolation - perhaps common in pioneers - and destructive in the way it undermines. This morning the isolation lost, leading to action which has given fresh hope.

Concerned about how I would complete the study and assignment attached to this piece of pioneering I had the (rare) sense to speak with my tutor. 'How do I pioneer (to a timetable) in the midst of the barriers?', I asked. In the midst of his good counsel was the advice to keep walking with the older women I am working in partnership with. The word 'with' stuck out for me, and I went out this afternoon to find the women in their meeting at the local estate church.

What a blessing!

They were just settling down for a 'member's afternoon' and the 'elder stateswoman' opened in a prayer which amongst others included the isolated and lonely people of our community. The fervent desire to see these people know God's love appears to be shared by most of the group. I realise that what I have been seeing as MY agenda I am trying to get them to buy into is actually THEIR agenda that I can join. (Not surprising as it is God's mission!)

We continued with several items - songs, prayers, readings that focused on their own individual relationships with God... and I found myself feeling we were retreating into a safe space, until I suggested as my item 'Go tell it on the mountain'. There was a release of energy experienced as we sung this suggestive of an unrealised desire in many of those gathered to tell of their experience of Jesus.

Mention of a video testimony by my learning disabled daughter led to much laughter and some quiet reflection as members considered whether they could record such a film, (she has asked when others will do so). One woman gave testimony then and there, and another engaged with the possibility of making a video. Again I sensed the unrealised possibilities for engagement in God's mission.

Following on from the earlier prayer (central to which was the concept that knowing God was with them would be adequate company and contact for the lonely) I allowed a question about how local people who are lonely might come to know the love of God hanging in the air. It didn't seem appropriate to seek answers, instead the way may have been opened up for some one-to-one conversations. Talk moved on to the possibility of making marmalade after a comment about seville oranges being in season..... this may be an activity for next week.

Finally, tea was made (porcelain cups and saucers with metallic trim) and I was asked a question about a planned youth residential I am involved in leading. It was a pleasure to tell them of the 8 local young people who are going, and it transpired one of the women wanted to ask the others to support the event with a donation. Hearts of gold!